Where every Tuesday: I confess.
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Confession: I strongly, strongly, dislike New Year’s Eve.
I’ve never been a big fan of “going out” and that was never going to change to celebrate a day. For as long as I can remember, I have celebrated the holiday in my pajamas by 5pm, junk food ready to be eaten, football on the tv, and it ends up like almost every other night except that I force myself to stay up until midnight, say Happy New Year, and then go to bed.
Aside from my dislike of going out on an overpriced holiday, being with tons of people who are usually drunk and then driving home amongst the drunk people, I have tried to really pinpoint why I really don’t enjoy this holiday.
I think I have it figured out.
Resolutions all seemed to be focused on changing what you didn’t like about yourself. (and this always come on the heels of a nice sugar binge during Christmas, so there’s that!)
- I am going to lose weight
- I am going to eat better
- I am going to stop eating out as much
- I am going to quit spending as much money
- I am going to quit my job I hate
Nowhere does anyone CELEBRATE what you accomplished in the last 365 days and resolutions always felt like they came from a place of self-loathing or focusing on the negatives of yourself.
And the words you use matter. If you like resolutions and goals, rephrase everything. Try these phrases instead of the ones listed above.
- I am going to lose weight – I want to move easier. without pain, and have less impact on my joints. I will do this by focusing on moving every day.
- I am going to eat better – I will focus on nourishing food to fuel my body, ease inflammation, and improve my mental capacity.
- I am going to stop eating out as much – I will make more meals at home so they can be nutritious and cost effective.
- I am going to quit spending as much money – I am going to focus on a budget so that I can be in control of my finances.
- I am going to quit my job I hate – I am going to look for new opportunities that light my fire and get me excited.
The more specific you make your goals and resolutions, and you truly understand why and how they will impact you, the better your odds are at success.
Let’s go back to the celebration. Have you sat down and reflected on how many amazing things you did in 2015? I bet you haven’t. Most of us are so focused on moving forward so quickly, we don’t even pause to reflect.
I have 2 challenges for you: The first is that you reflect and pick out at least 5 things from 2015 where you were awesome and so proud of yourself. The second is to EMAIL firstname.lastname@example.org them to me so I can celebrate with you. I want to hear about your amazing 2015.
If your first thought is “my year sucked” you really need this exercise. I can guarantee that amongst the bad, you were really awesome at surviving and getting through. You can, and you will, find at least 5 things to celebrate.
If you are going to set goals and resolutions for the New Year, be specific, share them with others, and if you get off track, find a new route. So often we set our goals and sights too big and too unrealistic and then we fail and say “forget it.”
For myself, instead of numerous goals or resolutions, I am going to pick a word or phrase of the year as a theme. I’m not sure what it will be yet, but then I can always come back to it when setting other goals.
Remember at the beginning of this confession, I talked about my dislike for New Year’s? I should clarify. It’s really New Year’s Eve because i LOVE New Year’s Day. I have a set tradition that was born out of my dislike for NYE. On January 1st, EVERY YEAR, I stay home, in my pj’s, clean parts of my house, purge, watch football, cook some yummy food, make pots and pots of soup to freeze, and relax.
This is such a tradition for me and it makes me so happy that most of my friends and clients know not to ask me to do anything on January 1st. They know it’s stay home, pajama day.
I encourage you to make a new tradition that you love around the New Year.
Ring in 2016 in a way that feels good to you, fuels your motivation, and creates excitement about what’s to come.
I am busting at the seems with ideas for the next year and I am thrilled to have you with me along the way.
I can’t wait to read your celebrations of 2015.